(REQ) Fears of Children
#1
There are two kinds of RiffTrax shorts.

The first are the straightforward ones, the ones where they teach a grown man not to use poisonous snakes as suspenders or a sentient belt sander shows a girl the error of her ways. Then there’s the nutty ones. The ones where, say, a depressed kid drowns his teddy bear, a guy dropkicks a turtle, or parents sleep in separate beds because their kid is too big of a wiener.

ALL of those things happen in Fears of Children! It tells the story of Paul, a boy whose general vibe is “shellshocked Urkel.”  He’s terrified to do things most boys love, like “riding bikes”, “exploring caves” and “being in the same room as your father.” This of course produces some of the best Angry RiffTrax Parenting this side of David & Hazel.

If you had a nickel for every laugh-out-loud moment in this short, you’d be able to afford all the roast beef you want. Join Mike, Kevin, and Bill for Fears of Children.
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#2
One shellshocked Urkel with a side of pee pee pants coming up!
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#3
(Mar 12, 2021, 19:22 pm)kitcastuff Wrote: One shellshocked Urkel with a side of pee pee pants coming up!

Thanks! This one sounds like a life changer... Big Grin
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#4
The term "shellshocked Urkel" kind of makes my skin crawl.  I mean, invoking the name of Urkel kind of does that anyway, but the additional descriptor ramps it up.

Anyway . . . thanks kitcastuff!!
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#5
Thanks kitcastuff. From the title, I was expecting this to be about my "eccentric" uncle Karl and his weekly "midnight visitations." Whew, what a relief!
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#6
Three comments:

1)  Very funny Riff.
2)  That poor, poor mum (mom if you are American).
3)  I do not want that boy within a five mile radius of myself.
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#7
Thanks for this one, Kitcastuff!
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#8
Thanks much kitcastuff! Sure would like to know how Rifftrax got hold of my old childhood home movies.
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#9
Thank you!
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