How do I unlock my Steam account for free?

[Stargate38]

I only play games that are completely free (i.e. Naev). Can someone please tell me how to get to level 1 without paying anything? I hate it that I can't post a review, submit friend requests, or subscribe to content. I'm sure someone around here knows how to do it for free, as it's more annoying than anything else I've run into. Also, can someone please tell me where I can get legit keys for a given game for free, or how to deDRM them?

[waregim]

I believe you would need to hack *their* server.

[dueda]

I only play games that are completely free (i.e. Naev). Can someone please tell me how to get to level 1 without paying anything? I hate it that I can't post a review, submit friend requests, or subscribe to content. I'm sure someone around here knows how to do it for free, as it's more annoying than anything else I've run into. Also, can someone please tell me where I can get legit keys for a given game for free, or how to deDRM them?

Getting legit keys for free is possible IF apps go on special event promotions and you're lucky, or with a keygen, a hacker friend, stealing them from a retail box, etc. 
Sometimes you can find keys on torrents like "100 keys for WindowsXP" or on dark web sites. Use at your own risk.
How to remove DRM is a silly question, there's no universal crack tool or method, it's a per-app job that requires a lot of knowledge and intelligence, enough said.